Here below a short and well-known parable that I like to think of when things in life don’t go as expected.
When they happen, disappointments can be painful and difficult to deal with. However, with hindsight, the things that didn’t work, or that I couldn’t get, so often make sense later, very much depending on how I chose to deal with and interpret them.
For instance, years ago I was working part-time as a teacher in adult education, a profession I very much enjoyed and that gave me a stable income while I was building up my healing practice.
After many years of being in this profession suddenly there was a change of law and given I don’t actually have a teaching diploma (I studied international politics) I was no longer allowed to teach- from one year to the next, despite having worked there to everyone’s satisfaction. It was a shock and hugely confronting.
At this stage in my anger, I could have hollered and fumed at “the government” and insisted on being a powerless victim etc…
But while I was dealing with the shock, I was very much aware that there was also a deeper truth, one that I decided to listen to, even though I was afraid.
My deeper truth was that it was more than time for me to establish my healing practice full time.
Much as I enjoyed teaching, I knew that my coaching practice was my real calling. While teaching gave me safety and structure, it also shielded me from having to confront and explore the question I was most afraid of: Could it work? Would it be possible for me to have a full-time practice, live from it, would sufficient people come? Did I have it in me?
I decided that I would dare and I gave myself one year to explore this question. If in one year it wouldn’t work, I would have to look for another job.
That was several years ago. I never looked back.
What initially upset and scared me actually set me free.
I think often we don’t know why things happen, nor can we ever control life. But we have a choice in how we deal with things when they do happen and what meaning we chose to attribute to them. A vital step is to listen deeply and despite the fear, despite that voice of no which can take endless shapes and forms, take the step we are being asked to take.
At times, it can feel like learning to walk on water.
Yet I think this is the path of love.
Here then the parable of”the Old Man and his Horse”:
In a village, high up in the Chinese mountains of Qinghai, lived an old man, who owned a beautiful white horse.
Such was the beauty of this horse that many kings came to offer fantastic sums for it, but the man always refused, being very fond of it.
One morning the horse was no longer to be found in the stables. The whole village gathered and complained to the old man, “You fool! We knew one day the horse would be stolen. It would have been better to sell it, especially at this high price. What a misfortune! What a loss!!”
Yet the old man said: “You have no way to know whether it is misfortune. Don’t judge, stick to the facts and say: ‘The horse is no longer in the stable’. Whether it is luck or misfortune we do not know”. The villagers walked away shaking their heads laughing at this naïve old fool.
However, the following day the horse returned. It hadn’t been stolen, but simply escaped into the wilderness. And coming home that day, it also brought a dozen wild horses with it. Again, the people gathered and said: “Old man, you were right! It wasn’t misfortune, it was the greatest of luck!”
Yet also here the old man replied: “Again you’re going too far. Just say, “The horse is back.” Who knows whether this is a blessing or not?”
The old man had a single son who began to train the wild horses. Just a week later whilst training the boy fell off a horse and broke his legs.
People gathered again and shouted: “Again you were right! What a terrible accident. Your only son can no longer use his legs, and he was the only support of your age! Now you are poorer than before. Such a misfortune! Such a loss!”
The old man replied: “As I told you, stick to the facts, by simply saying that my son has broken his legs. I do not know whether this is a blessing or a misfortune. Life comes in fragments, like a page of a book you don’t know yet how the book will end.”
It happened that after a few weeks the country started a war. All the young men of the village were forcibly drafted to the military. Only the son of the old man was left behind because he could not walk. The whole place was filled with lamentations and cries of pain, because this war could not be won and it was known that most young men would not return home.
They came to the old man and said, “Again you were right, old man – it did turn out to be a blessing. Your son cannot walk, but he is still with you. Yet our sons are gone forever.”
The old man answered: “I told you, stop judging. Nobody can ever know! Just say that your sons were drafted into the army and that my son was not. Only life and what you make out of it can place it into the right light.”
Hope to see you soon, in my healing practice or at a workshop!
With love, Irene
“Your introduction of EFT in my life was a “life-changing” experience. There was a huge energy shift, a ‘programming’ which had burdened me my whole life disappeared, by the ‘simple’ technique of tapping and finding the right words. In so little time. Mind-blowing.
This experience was definitely continued during the weekend in March in Orval. I came with an open, curious mind for what it would bring; not in a million years was I prepared for what it really brought me. I learned so much about myself. It was stunning to experience that you build such a deep connection with people you’ve never met before. All thanks to the safe and warm environment you offer, to the ‘spot on’ experience, sessions you offer. Of course, it also depends on how much the other people are willing to share, but in our group, it was all so warm, magnificent, with such a lot of trust. Again a “life-changing” experiment for me. I think about this weekend with so much love, warmth and light.” Tamara